What is Domestic Abuse?

Domestic Abuse is present throughout society, usually hidden behind firmly closed doors.  It happens in almost all cultures and countries and touches all divisions of wealth, race, caste, religion, age and social class.  It is usually abuse of a woman by a man, although, men and women whether in gay or straight communities can also be victims of domestic abuse.

Domestic Abuse can be defined as physical, sexual, financial, emotional or psychological.  The abuser may be a spouse, boyfriend, lover, partner, co-habitee, ex-partner or ex-husband, son, father, brother, uncle or other close family member.  It includes threats of violence.

Physical: Can involve a single slap or blow, kicking, attempted strangulation, pushing, grabbing, punching, stabbing with a skewer, burning, hitting head on wall, bruising and/or breaking bones to extremely serious incidents of multiple assault or murder. 

Sexual: Can involve sexual assault, rape, non-consensual sex, torn vagina after insertion of foreign object, enforced pregnancy (no contraception), degradation, coerced sexual activity, acting out pornographic and violent male fantasies.

Financial: Can include denial/deprivation of money, personal money being taken away, not being allowed to work.

Emotional: Can involve isolation from friends and family, not allowed to have children and/or friends, verbal and physical threats, humiliation, degradation, intimidation, verbal aggression, interrogation and false accusations of infidelity, abuse of children, using children to join in abuse of mother.

Psychological: Can involve intimidating verbal threats, control, reciting failings, being told what to and what not to wear, dominance, denigration, hours of questioning, shouting, sexual violence, sleep deprivation, financial deprivation, criticism.